LA Story is one of those movies that I watched a LOT of times. It's not quite up there with Grease (1 or 2, really), or my all-time favorite and most watched When Harry Met Sally, but I have watched it a lot of times and still quote it frequently. There's the amazing scene at the restaurant with all the little conversation snippets (Trudi: Sheila has been studying the art of conversation. Harris: Oh, you're taking a course in conversation? Sheila: Yes. [long pause]), and the ridiculousness of ordering ("half double decaffeinated half-caf, with a twist of lemon."), but one of my favorite bits is this line by Trudi, "One of the first things I always teach my clients is about the point system. You should never have more than seven things on. You know, like your earrings count for two points, those daisies count for three points. But the best thing to do is, right before you go out, look in the mirror and turn around real fast, and the first thing that catches your eye, get rid of it. I mean, I had this thing in my hair before I left, remember? And I pulled it right out, 'cause as soon as I turned, gone! Marilyn Monroe did that."
This philosophy came to mind recently as friends and clients talked about how much they have going on right now - the school year is gearing up with assessments, reports, activities, etc.; we are smack dab in the middle of the busy period of the High Holidays; we are paying deep attention and giving emotional energy to the news out of Israel, of Florida, and the elections; we are dealing with the on-going grief from October 7th, only sharpened by the 1 year annivesary. And that's not counting any of the personal elements of health, finances, work, friends, family,' and more. It's A LOT. So, what does that have to do with Trudi's fashion point system?
It has to do with her solution. "...look in the mirror and turn around real fast, and the first thing that catches your eye, get rid of it." We can't take on everything, or keep doing everything. We need to look in the mirror, find something that's grabbing our attention, and take it off our plate. What's inordinately drawing your attention right now? Like the "thing" that had been in Trudi's hair, you don't need it. You'll be better off without it.
If you're having trouble figuring out what you can push off your plate (and I know that for many of us, it feels like everything on our plate just has to be done), try this technique:
Use a priority matrix to categorize tasks into one of four groups:
Important and urgent: Do
Important and not urgent: Schedule
Not important and urgent: Delegate
Not important and not urgent: Drop
Once you've done that, you can easily see which "to do's" can be off your plate either for good, for now, or for someone else to cover. Your life "outfit" will be better off for it.
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