We know that inspiration comes from all kinds of places, but it's hard to be in all the places at once! So, since it's my goal to help clergy with their important work, over the past year I've complied a number of stories that caught my attention as being a message that might be useful as a starter story for the High Holidays - perhaps for a sermon or congregational message or kavannah during services. Would love to hear if you end up using any of these.
Common Ground:
Heineken's ad called Worlds Apart: a campaign promoting openness and exploring whether common ground can unite people. The social experiment required strangers who had opposing beliefs on topics like feminism and climate change to work in pairs to complete a menial challenge. Once the participants had completed the challenges, the brand revealed their opposing opinions and gave them the option to either walk away or stay and discuss their differences over beer.
Denmark's TV2 did a series of ads about finding what we have in common vs. our perceieved differences. Here are 2.
Message About Benefits of Prayer
“Once a man was asked, ‘What did you gain by regularly praying to God?’ The man replied, ‘Nothing…but let me tell you what I lost: Anger, ego, greed, depression, insecurity, and fear of death.’ Sometimes, the answer to our prayers is not gaining, but losing; which ultimately is the gain.” - Author Unknown
Importance of Small Acts of Kindness
Several years ago, I invited a Buddhist monk to speak to my Senior elective class, and quite interestingly, as he entered the room, he didn’t say a word (that caught everyone’s attention).
He just walked to the board and wrote this: “EVERYONE WANTS TO SAVE THE WORLD, BUT NO ONE WANTS TO HELP MOM DO THE DISHES.” We all laughed.
But then he went on to say this to my students: “Statistically, it’s highly unlikely that any of you will ever have the opportunity to run into a burning orphanage and rescue an infant. But, in the smallest gesture of kindness — a warm smile, holding the door for the person behind you, shoveling the driveway of the elderly person next door — you have committed an act of immeasurable profundity, because to each of us, our life is our universe.”
This is my hope for you for the New Year, that by your smallest acts of kindness, you will save another’s world.
-John Perricone, Zen and the Art of Public School Teaching
Phrases to Consider Using in Tough Conversations As You Make Amends/Clear the Air Before Yom Kippur
I know this isn't how you planned for this to go. Let's restart.
Even when we have hard moments, I love you and I am here to help/partner/share.
I am on your team./You are not alone.
Let's share what we are feeling and then take a moment to each collect ourselves before we talk further.
On Building Trust
This is done from the perspective of a father to son, but could be applied more broadly.
Choosing the High Road/Retaining Dignity
"According to Variety, Adam studied acting at NYU, and one day after class, his theater teacher took him out for a beer (which sounds really nice!). But the reason his teacher wanted that one-on-one time with Adam was so he could give him the terrible advice that he should probably pursue another career. He said he had heart, but didn't really have what it took to make it in show business.
Fast forward a few years, and Adam had made it as a well known actor in Hollywood. He was out with a few friends, and who does he run into? None other than that teacher who told him to quit acting! What a delicious opportunity to rub his success in his teacher's face. People dream of this moment of redemption, and there it was, sitting in front of Adam's face like low-hanging fruit. But Adam didn't grab it; he's too class for that. He simply told his friends that "This is the only teacher to ever buy me a beer."
An old man meets a young man who asks him:
"Do you remember me? "
And the old man says no.
So the young man tells him that he was his student, and the teacher asks:
"What are you doing these days, what are you doing in your life? "
The young man answers:
"Well, I became a teacher. "
"Oh, how good, like me?" " Asks the old man.
“Well, yeah. Actually, I became a teacher because you were my inspiration to be like you. "
The old man, curious, asks the young man when he decided to become a teacher. And the young man tells him the following story:
"One day, my friend, who is also a student, came with a beautiful new watch, and I decided I want it."
I stole it, took it out of his pocket.
After a short time, my friend noticed that his watch was missing and immediately complained to our teacher, which was you.
So you turned to class and said, ‘This student’s watch was stolen today during class. Whoever stole it, please return it. '
I didn't return it because I didn't want to.
You closed the door and ordered us to stand and form a circle.
You were going to search in our pockets one by one until we found the watch.
Yet, you told us to close our eyes, because you will only look for his watch if we all have our eyes closed.
We did as you said.
You went from pocket to pocket, and when you searched in my pocket, you found the watch and took it. You kept looking in everyone's pockets, and when you finished you said, "Open your eyes." We found the clock. '
You didn't speak to me and never mentioned the event. You also didn't say who stole the watch. That day you saved my dignity forever. This was the most despicable day of my life.
But this is also the day I decided not to be a thief, a bad person, etc. You never said anything, and didn't even insult me or take me aside to give me a moral lesson.
I received your message in the clearest way possible.
Thanks to you I understood what a real teacher needs to do.
Do you remember this incident, Professor?
The old professor replied, 'Yes, I remember the situation with the stolen watch, which I was searching in everyone's pockets.' I didn't mention you, because I also closed my eyes while searching. '
This is the essence of teaching:
If to correct you must humiliate; you don't know how to teach. "
-unknown source
Building Someone Up/Self Impression
The story of a track coach with his runner and her reaction to her first race.
Importance of Intergenerational Interactions
The presence of the elderly around our youth can profoundly shape and enrich their minds.
(Anti) Gossip Advice from the Ancient Greeks
In Ancient Greece, Socrates had a great reputation for wisdom. One day, someone came to find the great philosopher and said to him:
"Do you know what I just heard about your friend?"
"A moment," replied Socrates. "Before you tell me, I would like to test it with the three sieves."
"The three sieves?"
"Yes," continued Socrates. "Before you speak about others, it's important to take the time to filter what you mean. I call it the test of the three sieves. The first sieve is TRUTH. Have you checked if what you're going to tell me is true?"
"No, I just heard it."
"Very well! So, you don't know if it's true. Let's move on to the second sieve, that of KINDNESS. Is what you want to tell me about my friend something good?"
"Oh, no! On the contrary."
"So," questioned Socrates, "you want to tell me something negative about him, and you're not even sure it's true? Perhaps you can still pass the test of the third sieve, that of UTILITY. Is it useful for me to know what you're going to tell me about this friend?"
"No, not really."
"Therefore," concluded Socrates, "what you were going to tell me is neither true, nor good, nor useful. Why, then, did you want to tell me this?"
"Gossip is a bad thing. Initially, it may seem enjoyable and fun, but ultimately, it fills our hearts with bitterness and poisons us."
Nas Daily's Summary of Judaism
Has some great summaries about what it means to be Jewish
Ancestors/Legacy
I AM MY ANCESTORS’ DREAM by Nikita Gill
Your ancestors did not survive
everything that nearly ended them
for you to shrink yourself
to make someone else
comfortable.
This sacrifice is your war cry.
be loud
be everything
and make them proud.
This is often misattributed to Charles Schulz. It was not written by him, but the message is still a great one.
You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just read it straight through and think about it and you'll get the point.
1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America pageant.
4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.
5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.
6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.
How did you do?
The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday.
These are no second-rate achievers
They are the best in their fields.
But the applause dies.
Awards tarnish ...
Achievements are forgotten.
Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.
Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:
1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.
Easier?
The lesson:
The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money ... or the most awards. They simply are the ones who care the most.
A young man named Avraham ("Avrumel") Greenbaum lost his entire family in the Holocaust. After the war, he came to America and wanted nothing to do with Judaism. He changed his name to Aaron Green, moved to Alabama and married a woman there, who, miraculously, was Jewish.
The day his oldest son Jeffrey turned thirteen, they were not going to celebrate his bar mitzvah. Instead, Aaron decided to recognize the day by taking Jeffrey to the mall and buying him anything he wanted there.
When they went into a big electronics store and were browsing, Jeffrey's eye caught something in an antique shop across the way. He was mesmerized. He couldn't take his eyes off what he had seen.
He told his father, "I don't want anything from the electronics store. I want to go across to the antique shop." When they got there, the boy pointed to an old menorah and said, "That's what I want for my bar-mitzvah."
His father couldn't believe it. He was letting his child purchase anything he wanted in the whole mall and this is what he was choosing? He tried to talk him out of it, but couldn't.
Aaron asked the shop-owner the price of the menorah. To his surprise, the man replied "Sorry, that's not for sale."
Aaron said, "What do you mean? This is a store." He offered a lot of money for it.
Again the owner refused, this time explaining, "I found out the history of this menorah. A man constructed it during the war and it took him months to gather the wood. It survived, but he did not. It's going to be a collector's item. It's not for sale."
Meanwhile, Jeffrey kept telling his father, "That's what I want. All I want is the menorah." So Aaron Green kept offering more money until the owner finally agreed to sell.
The boy was so excited. He took the menorah up to his room and played with it every day. One day the parents heard a crash from Jeffrey's room. They ran upstairs and saw the menorah shattered to pieces. The father yelled at his son for being so careless, as he paid so much money for it.
Afterwards, Aaron felt bad about his reaction. He suggested to his son, "Let's try to glue it back together."
While holding one of the pieces, the father noticed a piece of paper wedged inside. He pulled it out and started reading. Tears welled up in his eyes and soon after he fainted.
His family threw water on him and revived him. "What happened?", they asked.
He replied, "Let me read you this letter. It was written in Yiddish, so I'll translate.
"To whoever finds this menorah, I want you to know that I constructed it not knowing if I would ever have the opportunity to light it. Who knows if I will live till Chanukah to see it being kindled? In all probability, going through this war, I will not. But if Providence brings this menorah to your hands, you who are reading this letter, promise me you will light it for me and for us, my family, and those who gave their lives to serve G-d Al-mighty."
Aaron Green then looked up at his family and, in a choked-up voice with tears still in his eyes, said, "The letter is signed by my father."
They were all speechless. That family recognized the Divine Providence involved, how could they not! The hand of G-d was undeniable, taking a menorah from Europe and bringing it back to the family in a remote mall in Alabama, inspiring their spiritual journey.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Source: Adapted by Yerachmiel Tilles of Ascent Tzfat from a submission by Chayim Berkowitz of Tsfat (formerly of Miami), who received it from Yosef Hurwitz (still in Miami).
Overcoming Challenges
"For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life." - -Alfred D. Souza
Having Someone Who helps you believe in yourself
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